{"id":340,"date":"2021-11-13T12:10:30","date_gmt":"2021-11-13T15:10:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/duasformigasdesign.com.br\/beatriz-blog-teste\/?p=340"},"modified":"2022-03-30T14:56:10","modified_gmt":"2022-03-30T17:56:10","slug":"everyone-should-be-in-therapy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/duasformigasdesign.com.br\/beatriz-blog-teste\/everyone-should-be-in-therapy\/","title":{"rendered":"\u201cEveryone should be in therapy!\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\u201cEveryone should be in therapy!\u201d<\/p>\n

Is it\u00a0so??<\/p>\n

I hear this quite often and despite being a great enthusiastic and practitioner, my answer is:\u00a0No<\/strong>. I don\u2019t think\u00a0everyone<\/strong>\u00a0should either be in or start going to therapy.<\/p>\n

Whether being on one side as a professional, or on the other side as a patient, I believe in\u00a0the therapeutic process as the best (self) investment that can be made.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Through this treatment, the individual learns about himself- his personal and family story, how he feels and reacts, his own dynamics, and at the same time, also begins to notice and understand better how others interact with him.<\/p>\n

This means that he can learn more about himself as well as about those around him.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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It seems curious that we are updated in sophisticated technologies, well informed about so many subjects and, at the same time, literally so ignorant of our own functioning: of how and why we react, what frightens, confuses, triggers, energizes or even makes us happy.<\/p>\n

However, it cannot be said that \u201ceveryone should do it\u201d because there are prerequisites for this. I would say there are basically three, the first being the\u00a0Necessity<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Although some individuals often say they want to \u201cget to know themselves better\u201d as a reason to start therapy, it always seems to me that the reason for seeking treatment is because they can no longer\u00a0understand or deal by themselves\u00a0<\/strong>with certain aspects of their own life, relationships, problems, or other difficulties.<\/p>\n

This does not mean it is a deliberate lie or an intention to either \u201cfool\u201d himself or the therapist. The point here is a generalization: in fact, we don\u2019t\u00a0want\u00a0<\/strong>to change, but we\u00a0need<\/strong>\u00a0to because we\u2019re having problems with our previous ways of working issues out. Changes may even be consciously and theoretically desired very much, but they are\u00a0primarily<\/strong>\u00a0necessary or essential at the moment.<\/p>\n

Similar to our physiological functioning, the emotional one is also driven towards preservation and maintenance.\u00a0Put bluntly: we don\u2019t want (exactly) to change, but what we used to do before no longer works. This simple.<\/strong><\/p>\n

The second point is disposition. Repeating:\u00a0Disposition.<\/strong><\/p>\n

The readiness and motivation to face this process, which is quite peculiar, fearfull and makes many people feel strange.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo, I talk to someone I\u2019ve never met before, tell my problems, expose difficult subjects and intimacies, without knowing anything about this person\u2019s life? Just like this?!?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow can someone who doesn\u2019t know me at all help dealing with my issues better than myself, a friend or any family member? This is not possible.\u201d<\/p>\n

And the third point is\u00a0Courage.<\/strong>\u00a0You expose dark sides, \u201cshadows\u201d that are already difficult to make contact with being on\u00a0your\u00a0own, let alone in front of someone\u00a0!<\/p>\n

Need, willingness and courage have to be present at the same time. You may know or even feel that you would benefit from a therapy, but if you don\u2019t have the openness to face the process, it won\u2019t happen.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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There are also several stereotypes and distortions about it. I\u2019ll list some just as examples\u00a0:<\/p>\n

\u201cTherapy is essential and everyone should do it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTherapy is only for the weak and\/or very problematic\u00a0ones.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s just for freaks.\u201d (Yes, we still hear this in the 21st century. Fortunately, less and less.)<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s only for rich people.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a\u00a0fraud. No one can know you better than yourself.\u201d (Or your parents, loved ones, friends.)<\/p>\n

In contrast, here we go:<\/p>\n

Not everyone needs, wants or can be in therapy.\u00a0<\/strong>It takes determination, modesty and strength to start this process- in fact,\u00a0it is for the strong\u00a0ones.<\/strong>\u00a0The \u201cproblematic\u201d may have more apparent needs for treatment, but the range of \u201cneeded\u201d is broader; it only takes to be human to have conflicts, pains and doubts, which is,\u00a0any of us…<\/strong><\/p>\n

As for the economic aspect, two observations:<\/p>\n

Going to a university that involves years of costly studies, internships- which in the clinical area (at least in Brazil), means working for free, and continuing to invest non-stop in expensive studies, courses and specializations thoughout all your professional life to \u201cdeceive others\u201d seems a rather stupid purpose financially speaking…<\/p>\n

Your mother, boyfriend or friends can (and should) be there for you as the loving ears and shoulders, but they are emotionally involved with you and are not trained to work things out as it is needed\u00a0to. Without forgetting that they may\u00a0be part<\/strong>\u00a0of some of these exact conflicts…<\/p>\n

Secondly, and very important, this is one of the few fields where professionals – even the most experienced ones, can frequently negotiate the cost of sessions, often reaching lower or maybe symbolic values. In addition, there are educational and training institutions that offer what\u2019s called \u201csocial\u201d or free services.<\/p>\n

In short: whoever has the desire, courage and modesty enough to do it, can search for therapy. As for he rest: how, where and with whom, will be easily resolved. Limited financial resources don\u2019t prevent this.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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There is another classic line of distortion, this one regarding the therapeutic process, which basically boils down to 2 opposites:<\/p>\n

The therapist who \u201clicks\u201d your wounds with you, something like indulging in self-pitty with an echo. You complain, and the professional joins in: \u201cYeah\u2026poor you\u00a0! With parents like that, you can\u2019t really be happy, grow up, resolve your issues or be successful\u2026\u201d (And in this case, you would be dependent on the therapist, of course, because he \u201cunderstands you\u201d.)<\/p>\n

Another is therapy as a \u201cshock treatment\u201d: a strong and endless process of emotional suffering in which you can even \u201cincrease\u201d your problems by talking about them so much.<\/p>\n

As a work that involves emotions, thoughts, elaboration, understanding, internal reorganization, interpretation, behavior and a series of points – often not very apparent or clear- difficulties, doubts and oppositions may frequently come up.<\/p>\n

It is about\u00a0subjectivity<\/strong>\u00a0and, as such, it can be poorly understood and also undervalued.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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The therapeutic process can be started from specific complaints or demands, but it will always involve bringing out fears, thoughts, feelings, emotions, patterns, vulnerabilities, elaborations of life stories, family. They are self-revelations, reports and reflections about one\u2019s most important relationships, experiences and how they\u2019re experienced.<\/p>\n

And the\u00a0bond\u00a0<\/strong>with the therapist is essential for this work to happen. It is natural that the recommendation of the professional as someone qualified for the job is an incentive, but empathy is essential.<\/p>\n

Certainly the term is familiar; we talk a lot about empathy, but here it can be defined as\u00a0feeling acceptance, trust and tranquility with that therapist.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Lots of certificates on the wall, referrals from someone very trustworthy, positions in institutions, scientific publications, active social media, etc. won\u2019t be enough if you don\u2019t feel comfortable with the therapist.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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The outbreak of the Pandemic showed the importance of mental health care; how much\u00a0the integration of psychic and emotional aspects to physical health is fundamental for our well-being.\u00a0<\/strong>This is of great importance to break down prejudice, to take this aspect of health out of the background and help those in need.<\/p>\n

Therapy is a hard journey indeed, but the discoveries, insights and changes it brings about are beautiful, thrilling and encouraging for both the patient and the therapist. (Sorry for the sentimentality, but they\u2019re really beautiful!)<\/p>\n

It is the best recognition of our work to see someone understand, discover his own \u201chidden treasures\u201d, feel better, improve and have more fulfilling relationships with others and with life itself.<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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(De: Sa\u00fade mental na pandemia – 77, published in Nov\/2nd\/21)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cEveryone should be in therapy!\u201d Is it\u00a0so?? 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